Sex Shop Rendezvous

It was a Monday night and I was on a mission. I was dissatisfied with the bottle of lube I had been toting around for intimate liaisons for the past year or so. I had hoped to use it to completion but enough was enough, it smelled too sweet, left weird stains, and did not agree with my anatomy. It had to go.

I was in good company, tall, sweet, eager to learn and kind of green. I’m me.

I used to love going into sex shops. I found the Good Vibrations in Brookline to be an oasis of serenity and pleasure in my harried undergrad years. From cutting edge toys made from safe materials to their informative workshops hosted by educators from all over the country, I felt at home there. I, however, don’t keep the tabs that I used to on the adult novelty industry.

I made a beeline for the lube. I could tell which one I wanted from the bottle and the way the fluid looked in the bottle. Reminded me of my old fave from the UK which you can’t get over here anymore. My accomplice, a few paces behind me, said something about something looking painful. This could have been about a myriad of implements, but I was sure it wasn’t about the lube.


“Those are chastity cages,” I said to him as he blankly stared down at the steel devices. “They can be painful. Especially when you wake up in the morning, the ring sort of crushes your balls thanks to morning wood.”

Silence.

“They’re a great way to get what you want out of somebody.”

More silence. Followed by “Why?”

No time for explanations, this was obviously not for us. I dragged him over to the vibrators to gush over the clever designs knowing that it had been too long since I browsed.

I fell in love with a ball gag. Found a new brand of toy that I absolutely need to check out. I stunned my sidekick with my excitement.

“So, what interests you? He didn’t have an answer so I lead him into a back room where they kept most of their sexy clothing and costumes. “I wish they had this in your size,” I said. “WHY?” he spat, still perplexed at the vast differences in other peoples’ urges and desires. “I don’t know. I just would. It would be fun. It would suit you. Do you think this would fit me?”

“Have you seen how big your boobs are?”

“They don’t need to stay in, that’s the point. To look like they are going to burst out.”

Whenever things start going south, always defer to tits. He couldn’t argue with that.

He didn’t seem completely confused, more like overwhelmed taking in all of the objects and info I was throwing at him.

“Is there anything you’d like to try to use here?” I figured I’d try again with the mood calmed thanks to the serene impact of talking about my tits.

“Well if you’d like to use this on me, I would be down.” 


I smiled, “I’ve never used one before, but I’d love to try.”

I need more dates that start off in fancy sex shops.